To be or not

To be a chef or not to be a chef, that is always the question to me in a kitchen.
My job, as a chef, do what I'm told, cook what I get told to cook, clean what to clean.
Come in, do your job, leave, repeat again.
It's not your kitchen, its not your establishment, its not your food.

Pft!!

Yet my responsibilty as a chef goes much deeper.
My responsibility is to care, have Passion and further grow and educate myself and others.
To do what I'm told but question if its done right. To work long and hard and put 110% in
To cook with love and care.
To cook fresh and not frozen.
To understand what you do effects others. What others do effects myself.
To treat the place as if its your own.
Your own food, your own kitchen, tour own establishment!
To clean it clean it clean it. To keep standards in place and not get low.
To have Passion and pride in your food.
To have a working, fictional team that ate on the same level.

This place does not.
And I'm sick of it.
The Passion has gone and my standards are depleted.

I don't care and I am Going.
I've tried. Succeeded in sone areas, failed in others.
It's now up to them.

Change or not.

My life as a chef has been mainly learning what never to do.
My teachings and standards are thought by myself.

Oneday I will have my own resturant.
And Oneday ai will be given all I desire for that establishment.

It will be a success.
And it will stay a success!

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what is love?

Live is a very powerful energy.
It can move us in cosmic ways of unnoticablity.
We grow, we see, we touch and we feel.
A single cell organism exppanding and expanding.
The point of being to far and blinding the innocent.
Those innocent eyes...

Be aware, feel the growth, see the change.
Don't let it blind yourself.

Love unconditionaly.
Love yourself.
Love what is!

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myself

All by myself, in a town I don't know.
People I can't relate with, people I can't connect with.
People that don't understand. People that don't put the amount in.
People with walls, people in denial.

All alone, unhappy because of one event. Will there be more?
Will we connect?

Can we come to an understanding.
Or will we not agree on values.

Will I be left in The deep
All alone. Or will you help?

Either way it doesn't make me happy.
At this point.

Xsw home now or keep fighting.

Maybe I should be at home closer then far away further.

Esperance....

Help!

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suprise me!

I love suprises!
From big to small.
Tiny little ones to massive big ones, bring them on.
They can be little as kisses in the morning or tiny gifts.
Or big ones like permusuise blow jobs or back car seat sex!
I hope you like suprises!

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Excuse me!

Me.... Hello Sorry about the late notice but i have been unable to find work in town and so have moved to Eperance where there is work. its unfortunate because of the extendedf hours you have just given me to see my sion, which i really appriciate thank you. i will contact you asap when i arrive back in town because seeing our son will be of high priority. As always i know your doing a wonderful job as a mother, please give my son my love Thank you :) .. Next message ------me Im sorry about the late confermation. i arranged with you to see my son early that friday because i had to be in perth for the intereiw, then back sunday to see my family and girlfriend before i drove down monday. im looking at 3 months or until i can pay my bills. im sure my son will not mind and sure you would rather full payments then centerlink payments. i will send my son a post card often ok. Thank you .. Next message-------her I really hope you understand that this will affect your son alot... I gave you more time to see your son because of the fact you saying you wernt going to Just get up and leave again and I trusted that.. Which I'm guessing is very clear to you it is exactly what you have done... Fair call you can't get work here but I don't want you to be in and out of your sons life as you please and expect to be instant dad when you come back that is so unfair on him at his age right now or not and also me.. and also the money you pay helps but I do not rely on it. Enjoy your time away. .. Next message------me My son is 1 and wont really have a clue weather im there or not and to mention ive bearely seen him in his life anyways. Dont tell me what i can and cant do, understand your not the only one with trust issues I am a chef, i will travel where work is and do what i must to please. Just as youve done yourself And im sure you had a good understanding this was going to happen anyways. So its not my fault you dont want to do anything. At the end of the day he is my son too and i have full right to see him as the farther, i will be there and support him as best i can aswell as fullfilling my duties and resposibilites, even if it is in and out of his life So dont hint that i must stay in bunbury for the rest of my life for m,y son and your sake. Dont bother talking to me if your goning to bitch and make my life harder ok. i dont want anything to do with it your problems

this feeling

I've felt this feeling before.
This feeling of loneliness.
This feeling I've being by yourself.
This feeling of being trapped.
This feeling for you.

I've felt it all before.
Is this what makes a real man?

How long can I do this for?
How long can I be without you?

How long can I be with myself?

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love love love

I am In love love love!!! Super happy tabulous! Smiling saints and laughing aches. I'm leaving leaving leaving. Scared face, and jealous tastes. Worried mind and sore eyes. Emotions emotions emotions. Wise advise with a hearts delight. Strength and sight of a shining knight. Feelings feelings feelings It will be what you think. It will end how you want it. Love love love!!!!